Y arent Indians accepting Homosexuality as a part of society

ON KRISHNA'S CHARIOT STANDS SHIKHANDI
(http://devdutt.com/on-krishnas-chariot-stands-shikhandi) the original document is on this site.

it was the ninth night of the war at Kurukshetra. The exact midpoint of the legendary 18-day bloodbath. Not the start, not the end, but the middle. The war had been inconclusive. Sometimes the Kauravas led by the old sire Bhisma had the upper hand; sometimes the Pandavas led by the young warlord, Dhristadhyumna, Draupadi’s twin brother, had the upper hand. A see-saw that was going nowhere.

“Bhisma loves us too much to defeat us,” said the Pandavas.

“Yet not enough to let us win,” reminded Krishna. “He must die, if dharma has to be established.” But Bhisma had been given a boon by his father that he could choose the time of his death. No one could therefore kill him. “If we cannot kill him, we must at least immobilize him.”

“But no one can defeat him,” said the Pandavas. “Even the great Parashurama could not overpower him in a duel. So long he holds a weapon in hand he is invincible.”

“Then we must make him lower his bow,” said Krishna.

“He will never lower his bow before any armed man.”

“What about an armed woman?”

“A woman? On the battlefield?” sneered the Pandavas, forgetting they themselves worshipped Durga, the goddess of war and victory. “But it is against dharma to let women hold weapons and step on the battlefield.”

“Who said so?” asked Krishna.

“Bhisma says so. Dharma says so.”

“Dharma also says that old men should retire and make way for the next generation so that the earth’s resources are not exploited by too many generations. But Bhisma did the very opposite. He renounced his right to marry, so that his old father could resume the householder’s life,” argued Krishna.

“He was being an obedient son.”

“He was indulging his old father at the cost of the earth. That vow spiraled events that has led to this war. It is time to be rid of him, by force or cunning, if necessary. We must find someone before whom the old patriarch will lower his bow. If not a woman, then someone who is not quite a man.”

“What about Shikhandi!” said Dhristadhyumna. “He is my elder brother. He was born a woman. But my father, Draupada, was told by the Rishis that he would one day become a man. Though born with female genital organs, Shikhandi was raised a son, taught warfare and statecraft. He was even given a wife. On his wedding night, the wife, daughter of king Hiranyavarna of Dasharna, was horrified to discover that her husband was actually a woman. My father tried to explain that actually Shikhandi was a man with a female body and that Rishis had told him he would someday acquire a male body. The woman refused to listen. She screamed and ran to her father and her father raised an army and threatened to destroy our city. A distraught Shikhandi went to the forest, holding himself responsible for the crisis, intent on killing himself. There he met a Yaksha called Sthunakarna who took pity on him and gave him his manhood for one night. With the Yaksha’s manhood, Shikhandi made love to a concubine sent by his father-in-law and proved he was no woman. The wife was therefore forced to return. Now, it so happened, that Kubera, king of the Yakshas, was furious with what Sthunakarna had done and so cursed Sthunakarna that he would not get his manhood back so long as Shikhandi was alive. As a result what was supposed to be with him for one night has remained with him till this moment. My elder brother, Shikhandi, born with a female body, has a Yaksha’s manhood right now. What is he, Krishna? Man or woman?”

Krishna knew things were more complex. Shikhandi, may have been raised as a man and may have acquired a manhood later in life, but in his previous life, he was a woman called Amba, whose life Bhisma had ruined. Bhisma had abducted her along with her sisters and forced them to marry, not him, but his weakling of a brother, Vichitravirya (a name that means ‘queer masculinity’ or ‘odd manliness’). When she begged Bhisma to let her marry the man she loved, he let her go. But the lover refused to marry Amba, now soiled by contact with another man (Bhisma). Distraught she returned, only to have Vichitravirya turn her away, and Bhisma shrugging helplessly. “When you have taken the vow of never being with a woman, what gave you the right to abduct me,” she yelled. Bhisma ignored her. Amba begged Parashurama, the great warrior, to kill Bhisma but he failed. Exasperated, irritated, she prayed to Shiva. “Make me the cause of his death,” she begged. Shiva blessed her – it would be so, but only in her next life. Amba immediately leapt into a pyre eager to accelerate the process.

“I think, Shikhandi should ride into the battlefield on my chariot. Let Arjuna stand behind him,” said Krishna. The tenth day dawned. The chariot rolled out. Behind Krishna stood the strange creature, neither man nor woman, or perhaps both, or neither, and behind him, Arjuna.

“You bring a woman into this battlefield, before me,” roared Bhisma seeing Shikhandi. “This is adharma. I refuse to fight.”

Krishna retorted in his calm melodious voice, “You see her as a woman because she was born with a female body. You see her as a woman because in her heart she is Amba. But I see her as a man because that is how her father raised her. I see her as a man because she has a Yaksha’s manhood with which he has consummated his marriage. Whose point of view is right, Bhisma?”

“Mine,” said Bhisma.

“You are always right, are you not, Bhisma? When you allowed your old father to remarry, when you abducted brides for your weak brother, when clung to future generation after future generations like a leech, trying to set things right. There is always a logic you find to justify your point of view. So now, Shikhandi is a woman – an unworthy opponent. That’s your view, not Shikhandi’s view. He wishes to fight you.”

“I will not fight this woman,” so saying Bhisma lowered his bow without even looking towards Shikhandi.

17“Shoot him now, Shikhandi. Shoot him, now, Arjuna,” said Krishna, “Shoot hundreds of arrows so that they puncture every inch of this old man’s flesh. Pin him to ground, immobilize him so that he can no longer immobilize the war.”

“But he is like a father to me,” argued Arjuna.

“This war is not about fathers or sons. This is not even about men or women, Arjuna. This is about dharma. And dharma is about empathy. Empathy is about inclusion. Even now, he excludes Shikhandi’s feelings – all he cares about his version of the law. Shoot him now. Rid the world of this old school of thought so that a new world can be reconstructed.”

And so Arjuna released a volley of arrows. Hundreds of arrows punctured every limb of Bhisma’s body, his hands, his legs, his trunk, his thigh, till the grandsire fell like a giant Banyan tree in the middle of a forest. It is said that the earth would not accept him for he had lived too long – over four generations instead of just two. It is said the sky would not accept him because he had not fathered children and repaid his debt to ancestors. So he remained suspended mid-air by Arjuna’s arrows.

With the fall of Bhisma, the war moved in favor of the Pandavas. Nine days later, the Kauravas were defeated and dharma had been established.

Without doubt, Shikhandi changed the course of the war and played a pivotal role in the establishing of dharma. He was without doubt a key tool for Krishna. A cynic would say, Shikhandi was used by Krishna. A devotee will argue, Krishna made even Shikhandi useful. But his story is almost always overlooked in retellings of the great epic Mahabharata, or retold rather hurriedly, avoid the details. Authors have gone so far as to conveniently call the Sthunakarna episode a later interpolation, hence of no consequence.

Shikhandi embodies all queer people – from gays to lesbians to Hijras to transgendered people to hermaphrodites to bisexuals. Like their stories, his story remains invisible. But the great author, Vyasa, located this story between the ninth night and the tenth day, right in the middle of the war, between the start and the finish. This was surely not accidental. It was a strategic pointer to things that belong neither here nor there. This is how the ancients gave voice to the non-heterosexual discourse.

Shikhandi embarrases us today. Sthunakarna who willingly gave up his manhood frightens us today. But neither Shikhandi nor Shthunkarna embarrassed or frightened Krishna or Vyas. Both included Shikhandi in the great narrative. But modern writers have chosen to exclude him. That is the story of homosexuals in human society. Homosexuals have always existed in God’s world but more often than not manmade society has chosen to ignore, suppress, ridicule, label them aberrants, diseased, to be swept under carpets and gagged by laws such as 377. They have been equated with rapists and molesters, simply because they can only love differently.

Indian society, however, has been a bit different from most others. Like all cultures, Indian culture for sure paid more importance to the dominant heterosexual discourse. But unlike most cultures, Indian culture did not condemn or invalidate the minority non-heterosexual discourse altogether. Hence the tale of Shikhandi, placed so strategically. Hence the tale of Bhangashvana, retold by none other than Bhisma to the Pandavas, after the war before he chose to die.

Yudhishtira asked, “Grandfather, who gets more sexual pleasure – men or women? What is sweeter to the ear – the sound of father or mother?”

Bhisma replied, “No one knows really. Except perhaps Bhangashvana, the only one who was both man and woman. Bhangashvana was a great king, with many wives and many sons. Indra cursed him to be a woman. So he lived as a woman, took a husband and bore him children. He was thus a man to his wife and a woman to his husband. He thus had two sets of children, one who called him ‘father’ and another who called him ‘mother’. He alone is qualified to answer your questions.” Such ideas will never find mention in most scriptures around the world. But they are part of our cultural inheritance.

Clearly many keepers of culture have not heard the stories of Shikhandi, or Bhangashvana or of Yuvanashva, the king who accidentally became pregnant and delivered the great Mandhata, or of the two queens who made love to each other to produce a child without bones (bones being the contribution of sperm, according to mythology), or of Mohini, the female form of Vishnu, who enchanted even Shiva, the great hermit. Clearly they have chosen to ignore that every year, in Brahmotsavam festival, the image of the Lord Venkateshwara Balaji, who is Vishnu on earth, is dressed in female garments reminding us all of Mohini. Clearly they are oblivious of how Shrinathji in Nathdwara is lovingly bedecked with a sari, the stri-vesha or women’s attire, in memory of the time he wore Radha’s clothes to appease her. Clearly they are not aware of Gopeshwarji of Vrindavan, Shiva who took the form of a milkmaid so that he could dance the raas-leela with Krishna. And they certainly have turned a blind eye to the rooster-riding Bahucharji, of Gujarat, patron goddess of many Hijras.

Western religions have, and will, look upon Hinduism’s cross-dressing gods as vulgar and perverted. The British mocked us so much during the Raj that we went into apology and denial. Now an entire generation does not even know about these tales and these deities and these rituals. Westernization did not change bedroom habits; it has led to an embarrassed denial of our sacred scriptures.

One thing we must grant the homosexual – he has united the cantankerous right wing. He has done what the constitution of India could not do – bring the radical Islamic cleric, the saffron robed yogis, the Bible-bashing clergyman to same side of the table. Together these self-proclaimed guardians of culture would like the homosexuals to be made invisible once more.

Baba Ramdevji would for sure celebrate the celibacy of Bhisma. If he would have his way, he would, perhaps, drag Shikhandi to the mental asylum and teach him breathing exercises until the Yaksha’s appendage drops and he/she chokes and gasps into heterosexuality. But not Krishna. On Krishna’s chariot, Shikhandi – as he/she is – will always be welcomed.

Raj Thackeray - a boon in disguise?

I totally agree with Raj's Views but do not agree at all with the ways he is using to implement them. remember raj fought for the 800 misplaced jet crews. where 650 of them were north indians. he is fighting for youth. I m just a local marathi boy.i know the ground reality. the menace from people from bihar and UP has reached up to the neck now. although violence i snot justified by anyone. but his speeches and talks for preserving the marathi culture is very influential. what uddhav should do is forget the political obligation with BJP and join raj in this fight for marathi cause(not take up violence)if uddhav has to set himself up in the stature of bal thackeray. get the DF government down and then do it the right way. this problem has occurred on first place only because the government failed to notice the discontent among marathi people for long. not to forget the media bias going around. r we looking at a arushi case like situation here? where media had already given the judgment against her father and he was set free in 50 days. i see hindi news channel airing like anything and everythig "GOONDA RAJ","RAK ki tanashahi" and much more. shouldnt they just report whats going on rather than making judgements just because they have high viewership in north india. as far unruly state is concerned. do u really think all the thousands of people protesting on streets are MNS workers? no they r not. the common marathi man has also come out in his support. take this. today three people were killed in violence in kalyan(the center place of all the activities). 2 bihari and 1 marathi in clashes ( not that i m justifying the kilings). now take this 12 biharis were killed in bihar alone by fellow biharis today itself in protest against raj. now which one is the unruly state?
I AM EXPECTING LOTS OF NASTY COMMENTS ON THIS. PLEASE FEEL FREE TO POST THEM JUST REFRAIN FROM USING ANY ABUSIVE LANGUAGE.I M TOTALLY AGAINST THE THE VIOLENCE HE IS USING TO JUSTIFY HIS POINT.AND IF YOU ARE NOT A GOOGLE USER THEN PLEASE LEAVE YOUR EMAIL ID SO I CAN REVERT BACK OTHERWISE IT JUST SAYS ANONYMOUS.

My Kanheri caves trip

Krishna was from Mathura or Manhattan?

My first rainy season India after four year. if it is to be believed what is said then rain brings fortune to the farmers but would it change my fate. I can just hope that it will wash out my problems. I recently spoke to a friends of mine. she is married and currently based in London for work. and surprisingly alone. yes her Hubby is right here in Mumbai. strangely I could not accept that fact because she is raised in a Gujarati family and even married of at early age because of her parents will. I kept questioning her hows this possible. " how did her in laws allowed her to go of to another country all on her own within first year of her marriage". was it her boldness? or her in laws open mind? or whatever maybe the reason. it shook my belief of conservative Gujarati parents. have we been to fast to judge our Gujarati girl-friends as a part of orthodox, 8pm deadline family? if you look at it there are many who even go abroad to study.I was surprised to see the change I have seen in some of my friends after marriage. some didn't choose to stay in contact. some use to attend our fortnightly friendly meeting tagged with their better halves. but what was it about prior to marriage and us(the guys)? why was it a big deal for a girl to stay out till 8 pm for dinner or taking permission for a disc would run a chill through their spine? are we the vicious demons for her parents? in a country where lord Krishna was allowed to flirt with not one but so many gopis at the the age of 13. we at 21 seem to be the real ravana of the 21st century?

Whats the height of reason to break your friendship with a close friend?

now thats a big statement. staying in US i have learnt that Never say never. neither of us do not know what future holds for us. I am not saying that either of us would be desperate to get some work done from each other. coz i know u aren't short of " Friends".I have fought with many people in the past. Hell i have made an entire community on that in orkut. however today i have realized that i am talking to all of them with an exception of one.(Zaheer) . neither me nor my friends had to apologise. time evolved and things became normal. hell we even forgot the reason we fought in some cases. In case of zaheer, he was a very very close and trusted friend of mine. i would say he was in my inner circle. however he did a terrible thing (which he has realised). it hurt me so much that i dont talk to him till date(thats 7 years). because the better the friends you are, the longer the time it takes to heal.
I can just say in every case there is a moment when you either forget what you fought for or come down to terms at least to face each other without hiding your faces. it could be tomorrow or ten years down the lane.(i guess by then it wouldn't even matter what hotel i was working in) i am not saying that it will take ten years to be friends. but maybe some day you will fell like the moment was right to let bygones be bygones. which is a positive attitude. but i don't think that moment has come to me yet. may be i was more hurt than you were , OR we were very good friends and thats why it is taking its own time to heal.( i hope its the later one). so you never know maybe i call you up some day or perhaps we bump into each other,or you mail me. but i wouldnt end this with a fullstop like( If ur nt ready2forget everythin dnt even bother replyin2dis mail.........I wudnt ever try2reach out2u). I can just say right now that i was badly hurt then and also I jus tght losin a frnd over such a stupid reason isnt worth it. so you never know.

Dost Dost Na raha, pyar to woh kabhi tha hi nahi.

They say if you think , you have fallen in love at first sight then you should probably get your eyes checked. but what if you have met someone over and over again. say for years. then what!! is there a thermometer available in the market which you can use to determine when you are in love. This is probably a very common trap in which only the guys fall in. the "Friendship trap". I am sure someone in some part of world has written a book on steps to prevent being someone's friend if you wish to date them. unfortunately the book is a little to late to reach me. so far i do not know any incidence of a successful friendship turn into love. or shall i say" FRYlove ". I Guess its a way of turning us down because she thinks we are not good for her, or not. whatever it is!!!. the trillion Rupee question is when can we strike the question in our level of friendship. is it when we think that she thinks it is comfortable enough to sip a mocha latte at 10 pm with a guy. or when she put her arms around you on the bike. 99% the answer results in " I think of you only as a friend". then why the heck we discuss your life issues at 2 am in night. doesn't she have her girl friends to talk about that. the truth is , its like a roller coaster. when you are at the top. the whole world is under you and the moment u say something mawkish. you will find yourself gushing right to earth and within no time your replacement is waiting in the queue to unseat you as her new friend. and if your" FRYlove"does not work out . then what!! can your other friends stay without judging you. and how good friends will you be then. wont it bother you? of course it will. so go to some library and buy yourself a guide to not falling in the "FRIEND" zone.as far as i m concerned. once bitten twice shy

Our parents always wish what’s best for us. or do they?

Once upon a time there was a girl and there was a boy, like anyone else the cupid struck them and they fell in love. No wait; they were bonded with a mutual agreement. That’s what I say when the conditions such as “ I will only get married after my sister gets married first” or “ we get married only when both our folks agree to this”.
They seem to forget that they need the stamp paper from their parents; the eternal judges.
What is it about our parents and not agreeing with the marriage with the third kind? By third kind I just mean some one from other religion, cast or race. (Whatever that’s suppose to mean). Why do they forget that if we are old enough to marry a person of their choice and then we are old to make that decision ourselves? I do appreciate the west in this regard where people are allowed to choose their own soul mates. Of course it has its own consequences. But hey it’s better to sleep with the known dumb then the unknown devil. When our parents argue all you could here is “we are doing it for your good only”Of course they are.
Suddenly Borivali seem to me the hub for All India association of parents against Love marriage. Keep marriage sideways. May it be career, or further studies our folks always try to suggest us what career to choose or in which country we shall pursue our post graduate degree? Take an example of my first cousin, my uncle wants him to pursue his MS in hospitality in Australia. My uncle won’t even know what the capital of Australia is. Or what are the prospects of studying hospitality there. When u put an argument in front of them they will simply say “it’s the feeling from inside our heart so take up the path we have chosen for you? Or for that matter even the partner we have chosen for you?” There is no grey area when it comes to our parents wishing the best for us. It’s true that they have raised us with outmost care and hard work. They have tried to give us best of the education, living and social life. And if this is what they keep for an argument. Then let me ask what’s keeping them from being the butcher who feeds his goat with all the right food at right moment. Just to cut its throat at right time and get the maximum gain from it. I conclude by saying that yes it is official that “Our parents ALWAYS wish what’s best for us” but I can still argue “do our parents always KNOW what’s best for us”
And FYI. Capital of Australia is not Sydney or Melbourne.

navratri in sankalp or jersey city?

Obviously sankalp!!! I know most of you think like that. No matter how many people turn up at the Jersey City navratri function? We cannot compare it to Snakalp. Ask someone like me, who is a beginner when it comes to garba. For me I am better of at Jersey City. Last night I went for playing or dancing orrrrrrrrrr-doing garba.
It all started at around 9 pm when people start coming in tired after their jobs and a busy Friday. Most of them were students. Most of them were happy coz they were going to play garba after a year or their assignments were completed. Frankly I don’t know which one is true. What started as a short round in no time it was a group of hundreds of desis dancing coordinately. I say this, because in NJ you are not allowed to form your own group and dance with your friends only. It’s a whole big round and almost everyone has to do the same step. Funny but true. In that sense it was good for me, so at least I can join everyone. Unlike kora Kendra in boriwali there looking at people dance was the only thing I was good at. In my previous post when I said that incredible India function was the most number of desis I had seen at one place. Well I was proven wrong last night. I was not sure all of them were Indian but at least from Indian origin. Except for the security people who were like bunch of wannabe mike Tyson. While playing garba I saw so many familiar faces. Like I had seen them if not met them in person. Same concept of friend’s cousin’s brother’s neighbor’s niece. Or maybe all gujus look alike LOL!! Just a joke. Anyways it was so much of fun, at least for me because at the end of the day few people came to me and said they actually do follow me when it comes to garba steps. (Jeez those people must be really bad at garba). Before the dandiya break we had aarti and couple of speeches from the mayor and senator (he came in sleazy half pants and blue jacket) from New Jersey. I couldn’t stop laughing at the narrator’s accent when he was introducing them. Something like Iris pents and return back to Mumbai fare. What he actually meant was Irish pants and round trip to Mumbai. Then during the aarti something happened which I did not agree on. The senator was given the aarti thali for prayer. Although I am very thankful to him for giving permission for the navratri celebration but an aarti thali in the hands of a person whose lunch and dinner menu was veal chops and roast beef. I don’t I just didn’t feel right. Is this the beginning of Americanization of navratri? I don’t just didn’t feel that was right.

oh god, yeh bhagwan ko kaun samajaye

YES!! what is about our parents and so strong view about getting married to someone from other religion. isn't love enough. in my entire lifetime which has just extended to 24 years i have already seen 3 unsuccessful affairs. I mean what is it? why does a person's religion comes before his or her love. the first one is between a friend who he is very close to me now and this out of normal perfect girl. it was suppose to be perfect secret love affair which no one had a clue about . but then guess what? he was seven seas' away(saat samundar par) and she was India. that's when the hell broke on them. NO its not that they could not handle a long distance relationship but it was the girl's father , the villain had decided to get her married somewhere else. and that's it. that was a full stop for a an affair longer than a year. back here in new york if u survive an affair with someone for a year, and next next thing u know you are married .another year and you are divorced. give it 6 more months and you might be seeing yourself at your second reception. second one ,actually my friend got married and is living with the better half happily. but guess what!!! the family has no clue that their child is married. because if disclosed it would break up the sky on their head(aasman tut padega).so much for an perfect Indian family. and the third one you have to listen to this. this ones actually under scrutiny right now. the problem; different religion. who is getting married the humans or god to bhagwan. why does it matter if u go to temple every Tuesday or a church every Sunday. i know that back home we curse the western rate of divorce. but Hellooooo! at least you are not pushed into the leaky cauldron. where you have no clue who is what. I for certainly do not agree with that ritual. i might sound so American. but this not what i agree on. that is it? we have to agree that some things are better done in the western style. is it so American to get married to person you love?