My Kanheri caves trip

Krishna was from Mathura or Manhattan?

My first rainy season India after four year. if it is to be believed what is said then rain brings fortune to the farmers but would it change my fate. I can just hope that it will wash out my problems. I recently spoke to a friends of mine. she is married and currently based in London for work. and surprisingly alone. yes her Hubby is right here in Mumbai. strangely I could not accept that fact because she is raised in a Gujarati family and even married of at early age because of her parents will. I kept questioning her hows this possible. " how did her in laws allowed her to go of to another country all on her own within first year of her marriage". was it her boldness? or her in laws open mind? or whatever maybe the reason. it shook my belief of conservative Gujarati parents. have we been to fast to judge our Gujarati girl-friends as a part of orthodox, 8pm deadline family? if you look at it there are many who even go abroad to study.I was surprised to see the change I have seen in some of my friends after marriage. some didn't choose to stay in contact. some use to attend our fortnightly friendly meeting tagged with their better halves. but what was it about prior to marriage and us(the guys)? why was it a big deal for a girl to stay out till 8 pm for dinner or taking permission for a disc would run a chill through their spine? are we the vicious demons for her parents? in a country where lord Krishna was allowed to flirt with not one but so many gopis at the the age of 13. we at 21 seem to be the real ravana of the 21st century?

Whats the height of reason to break your friendship with a close friend?

now thats a big statement. staying in US i have learnt that Never say never. neither of us do not know what future holds for us. I am not saying that either of us would be desperate to get some work done from each other. coz i know u aren't short of " Friends".I have fought with many people in the past. Hell i have made an entire community on that in orkut. however today i have realized that i am talking to all of them with an exception of one.(Zaheer) . neither me nor my friends had to apologise. time evolved and things became normal. hell we even forgot the reason we fought in some cases. In case of zaheer, he was a very very close and trusted friend of mine. i would say he was in my inner circle. however he did a terrible thing (which he has realised). it hurt me so much that i dont talk to him till date(thats 7 years). because the better the friends you are, the longer the time it takes to heal.
I can just say in every case there is a moment when you either forget what you fought for or come down to terms at least to face each other without hiding your faces. it could be tomorrow or ten years down the lane.(i guess by then it wouldn't even matter what hotel i was working in) i am not saying that it will take ten years to be friends. but maybe some day you will fell like the moment was right to let bygones be bygones. which is a positive attitude. but i don't think that moment has come to me yet. may be i was more hurt than you were , OR we were very good friends and thats why it is taking its own time to heal.( i hope its the later one). so you never know maybe i call you up some day or perhaps we bump into each other,or you mail me. but i wouldnt end this with a fullstop like( If ur nt ready2forget everythin dnt even bother replyin2dis mail.........I wudnt ever try2reach out2u). I can just say right now that i was badly hurt then and also I jus tght losin a frnd over such a stupid reason isnt worth it. so you never know.

Dost Dost Na raha, pyar to woh kabhi tha hi nahi.

They say if you think , you have fallen in love at first sight then you should probably get your eyes checked. but what if you have met someone over and over again. say for years. then what!! is there a thermometer available in the market which you can use to determine when you are in love. This is probably a very common trap in which only the guys fall in. the "Friendship trap". I am sure someone in some part of world has written a book on steps to prevent being someone's friend if you wish to date them. unfortunately the book is a little to late to reach me. so far i do not know any incidence of a successful friendship turn into love. or shall i say" FRYlove ". I Guess its a way of turning us down because she thinks we are not good for her, or not. whatever it is!!!. the trillion Rupee question is when can we strike the question in our level of friendship. is it when we think that she thinks it is comfortable enough to sip a mocha latte at 10 pm with a guy. or when she put her arms around you on the bike. 99% the answer results in " I think of you only as a friend". then why the heck we discuss your life issues at 2 am in night. doesn't she have her girl friends to talk about that. the truth is , its like a roller coaster. when you are at the top. the whole world is under you and the moment u say something mawkish. you will find yourself gushing right to earth and within no time your replacement is waiting in the queue to unseat you as her new friend. and if your" FRYlove"does not work out . then what!! can your other friends stay without judging you. and how good friends will you be then. wont it bother you? of course it will. so go to some library and buy yourself a guide to not falling in the "FRIEND" zone.as far as i m concerned. once bitten twice shy

Our parents always wish what’s best for us. or do they?

Once upon a time there was a girl and there was a boy, like anyone else the cupid struck them and they fell in love. No wait; they were bonded with a mutual agreement. That’s what I say when the conditions such as “ I will only get married after my sister gets married first” or “ we get married only when both our folks agree to this”.
They seem to forget that they need the stamp paper from their parents; the eternal judges.
What is it about our parents and not agreeing with the marriage with the third kind? By third kind I just mean some one from other religion, cast or race. (Whatever that’s suppose to mean). Why do they forget that if we are old enough to marry a person of their choice and then we are old to make that decision ourselves? I do appreciate the west in this regard where people are allowed to choose their own soul mates. Of course it has its own consequences. But hey it’s better to sleep with the known dumb then the unknown devil. When our parents argue all you could here is “we are doing it for your good only”Of course they are.
Suddenly Borivali seem to me the hub for All India association of parents against Love marriage. Keep marriage sideways. May it be career, or further studies our folks always try to suggest us what career to choose or in which country we shall pursue our post graduate degree? Take an example of my first cousin, my uncle wants him to pursue his MS in hospitality in Australia. My uncle won’t even know what the capital of Australia is. Or what are the prospects of studying hospitality there. When u put an argument in front of them they will simply say “it’s the feeling from inside our heart so take up the path we have chosen for you? Or for that matter even the partner we have chosen for you?” There is no grey area when it comes to our parents wishing the best for us. It’s true that they have raised us with outmost care and hard work. They have tried to give us best of the education, living and social life. And if this is what they keep for an argument. Then let me ask what’s keeping them from being the butcher who feeds his goat with all the right food at right moment. Just to cut its throat at right time and get the maximum gain from it. I conclude by saying that yes it is official that “Our parents ALWAYS wish what’s best for us” but I can still argue “do our parents always KNOW what’s best for us”
And FYI. Capital of Australia is not Sydney or Melbourne.

navratri in sankalp or jersey city?

Obviously sankalp!!! I know most of you think like that. No matter how many people turn up at the Jersey City navratri function? We cannot compare it to Snakalp. Ask someone like me, who is a beginner when it comes to garba. For me I am better of at Jersey City. Last night I went for playing or dancing orrrrrrrrrr-doing garba.
It all started at around 9 pm when people start coming in tired after their jobs and a busy Friday. Most of them were students. Most of them were happy coz they were going to play garba after a year or their assignments were completed. Frankly I don’t know which one is true. What started as a short round in no time it was a group of hundreds of desis dancing coordinately. I say this, because in NJ you are not allowed to form your own group and dance with your friends only. It’s a whole big round and almost everyone has to do the same step. Funny but true. In that sense it was good for me, so at least I can join everyone. Unlike kora Kendra in boriwali there looking at people dance was the only thing I was good at. In my previous post when I said that incredible India function was the most number of desis I had seen at one place. Well I was proven wrong last night. I was not sure all of them were Indian but at least from Indian origin. Except for the security people who were like bunch of wannabe mike Tyson. While playing garba I saw so many familiar faces. Like I had seen them if not met them in person. Same concept of friend’s cousin’s brother’s neighbor’s niece. Or maybe all gujus look alike LOL!! Just a joke. Anyways it was so much of fun, at least for me because at the end of the day few people came to me and said they actually do follow me when it comes to garba steps. (Jeez those people must be really bad at garba). Before the dandiya break we had aarti and couple of speeches from the mayor and senator (he came in sleazy half pants and blue jacket) from New Jersey. I couldn’t stop laughing at the narrator’s accent when he was introducing them. Something like Iris pents and return back to Mumbai fare. What he actually meant was Irish pants and round trip to Mumbai. Then during the aarti something happened which I did not agree on. The senator was given the aarti thali for prayer. Although I am very thankful to him for giving permission for the navratri celebration but an aarti thali in the hands of a person whose lunch and dinner menu was veal chops and roast beef. I don’t I just didn’t feel right. Is this the beginning of Americanization of navratri? I don’t just didn’t feel that was right.

oh god, yeh bhagwan ko kaun samajaye

YES!! what is about our parents and so strong view about getting married to someone from other religion. isn't love enough. in my entire lifetime which has just extended to 24 years i have already seen 3 unsuccessful affairs. I mean what is it? why does a person's religion comes before his or her love. the first one is between a friend who he is very close to me now and this out of normal perfect girl. it was suppose to be perfect secret love affair which no one had a clue about . but then guess what? he was seven seas' away(saat samundar par) and she was India. that's when the hell broke on them. NO its not that they could not handle a long distance relationship but it was the girl's father , the villain had decided to get her married somewhere else. and that's it. that was a full stop for a an affair longer than a year. back here in new york if u survive an affair with someone for a year, and next next thing u know you are married .another year and you are divorced. give it 6 more months and you might be seeing yourself at your second reception. second one ,actually my friend got married and is living with the better half happily. but guess what!!! the family has no clue that their child is married. because if disclosed it would break up the sky on their head(aasman tut padega).so much for an perfect Indian family. and the third one you have to listen to this. this ones actually under scrutiny right now. the problem; different religion. who is getting married the humans or god to bhagwan. why does it matter if u go to temple every Tuesday or a church every Sunday. i know that back home we curse the western rate of divorce. but Hellooooo! at least you are not pushed into the leaky cauldron. where you have no clue who is what. I for certainly do not agree with that ritual. i might sound so American. but this not what i agree on. that is it? we have to agree that some things are better done in the western style. is it so American to get married to person you love?

Not so Proud to be Indian

somewhere walking down the Manhattan avenues you can see a touch of India here and there. for we Indians, we take a lot of pride in explaining about the clothes on display or food on menu to our foreign counterparts. and we are very proud of our country at 60th independence day. last week new york got a little more of India than usual. there was incredible India at 60 function in Bryant park and south street seaport. which i thoroughly enjoyed. although two things were disappointment. one: a statement by colonial cousins on stage in front of what i can say the most number of desis i ever saw in new york together at one place ;stating" we know that we are celebrating 60 years of Independence and all that but WHATEVER, we are in new york people cheer up". was it really necessary to use words like "whatever" and "Independence and all that" just for a few claps and hoorays. i bet they got the maximum Boos. anyways secondly for the same function at south street seaport the Indian flag was all hoisted all over a ship late till 10pm well after the sunset. its an insult to hoist the national flag after sunset in India. even the dancers were merely waving the flag on their performance on song chak de. to add the icing on the cake this function was sponsored by the government of India. and i heard last week amir khan the actor got a notice from court because he attended a showroom opening on Independence day and the owner forgot to take the flags down before sunset. do the codes for our national flag do not apply in foreign country? that's not it,I work in hotel industry in new york . last week as we all know Sonia Gandhi was in new york. she happened to stay at an luxurious hotel. as Indians we all were very happy and proud. just a day before her arrival the hotel got an email from her staff clearly specifying that there should be no staff on Indian origin around the Indian mission apparently for "PRIVACY" reason. although they preferred a Chinese butler. and i though she came to NY to represent India at UN. i would have understood if she was here to talk with the US government but she was just to celebrate Gandhi jayanti as international non violence day. its was such an embarrassment to all the Indian staff at the hotel. maybe someone should tell her practice what you preach.

Friends in America but GUYS in india.

I am sure we all notice that as soon as students come to America or even before coming here. we start looking for distant relative or a friend's cousin's sister's boss's son who is living in America. or in this case NYC. who could at least pick us up at airport and maybe give a place to live for couple of days till we find a an affordable apartment. I am very fascinated about how Indian girls change their point of view about their male counterparts as soon as the country changes. as far as i know i distinctly remember back home i have heard girls saying that late night out with GUYS "No way". or " that GUY has an habit of drinking alcohol" or" jeez that GUY smokes".however as girls land in America they r fine the same person being their room mate. please dont get me wrong I m not pointing fingers at Indian girls , at least not all of them. what is it back home? is it your parents pressure back home or you can really compromise those habits under financial pressure or you girls really think that ah those are just petty things as compared to what Americans do so it should not bother us. Or is it that you realise that back home you were being a little orthodox and now its rite time and age to act maturely on such issues.are the same "GUYS" in India are really worth making friends in America?

is it really bad to go against what our mommy taught us?

most of us when study abroad. usually have cash jobs or on campus jobs. we usually make every effort to send a lot of money back home . and do live a little economically. somewhere we are trying to balance everything. but what if we see two of our American(or any other nationalities) counterparts falling in love and have an healthy relationship. usually they go clubbing , have three meals in a week in restaurants and spend a whole lot of time and money in sending SMS(although u have free minutes to talk). what if we do that for a change. are we as Indians suppose to feel guilty that this is not our culture and we are not allowed to spend money on "USELESS" things like clubbing,taking Cab instead of a subway or for that matter of fact firstly get into a relationship with a girl? if we see our American friends all happy in life with doing all this. are we suppose to feel bad that y this is not our culture?